Tag Archives: covert ops

How to somewhat successfully get your girlfriends ring size without her knowing

This week Amanda, hereafter referred to as Sleeping Beauty and her other aliases, started a new job. She has been working hard, getting up on a new early schedule (as she used to work evening shifts), and has been riding the high of the stress and excitement of a big life change.


Let me diverge for a minute- about 6 months ago I found THE RING. I saw it online in an instagram ad… note to small business owners, apparently those sometimes work. I knew the second I saw it that this was THE ring for Aurora. See she’s not your typical girly girl. She wants a more simple band, she doesn’t wear jewelry in general, and she doesn’t like to wear feminine things in general. So when you are a girl proposing to another girl, and she’s not the blingy engagement ring type, what do you use to propose? I want her to be able to select her own wedding band. I feel like that is something you will be wearing every day for, hopefully, the rest of your life and it has to be perfect for your hand. So I wanted her to have an engagement ring and a wedding band as two separate entities… unless she just really loves the engagement ring so much that she doesn’t want a second band.

I saw the perfect ring that just called to me for SB. It is black tungsten steel, won’t bend or scratch, and it has a red anodized interior. Black and red are her favorite colors. Now this may or may not sound like a plus to you but for Aurora it is- it was inexpensive and easily replaceable. She sometimes loses things and is not used to wearing and keeping track of a ring. I wanted this to be something that she would not have to stress about ruining or losing. It could happen, and I want it to be easy to replace while she gets used to having a ring.┬áThe only thing that was keeping me from buying this ring was that I was unsure of what size to get. I would have had it for months waiting for the right time.

I have been thinking about the proposal for awhile. When to do it? How to do it? While I am an introvert, and would probably like to be proposed to in a more intimate setting, SB is not. She is an extrovert, she likes big, bright, loud, shiny! I knew that the perfect proposal for her would have to be something largely public and grand. Of course I think she would accept any proposal but I wanted to make it perfect for her. I finally settled on a when and how but now the time is getting close and I still don’t know a ring size.

Being the planner I am I had actually tried to get her ring size in the past when I made her a ring around Christmas time in a metal smithing class I took. The ring was just a for fun ring and I didn’t realize that when you make a ring you should actually make it slightly too tight because once you completely polish it the ring will have actually increased in circumference. By the time SB got her ring it fit her middle finger much better than her ring finger. One more complication was that Aurora has been doing crossfit lately and has lost some weight and I think her fingers have gotten smaller. So now I just know that it has to be smaller than the ring I made her. How much? No idea.


So back to our story. I devised a plan to try to measure Auroras finger. She would be hanging out with some friends on friday night and no doubt celebrating her new job. I was hoping she would be drinking a little extra… Usually when she is out late with friends she sleeps on the couch so she won’t wake me up by coming in to bed. Frequently with the tv on. I was hoping she would pass out in the living room with the tv on and would be sleeping soundly enough and with enough background noise and stimulation that I could measure her finger without her waking up…

I had cut a decent length of dental floss and my original plan was to tie it on her finger and then use cosmetic scissors to cut it off, but I convinced myself that she would feel the scissors if the string was appropriately tight. So I opted to use a marker to mark the string where it crossed on her finger. I had all my supplies ready, plus my phone as a camera to take a video for her mom, when my alarm went off at 2am.

I went out into the living room and my plan was foiled! The tv was off and her hands were tucked in the blanket. I had to think fast! I woke her up and told her she should come in the room since I was up to go to the bathroom. She came to bed and I put on the tv “so I could fall back asleep”. I held her hand and waited until it seemed like she was sleeping. Then I very smoothly (probably not smoothly) loosened my hold on her hand and wound the string around her ring finger while holding her hand further out. I crossed the string over her finger and quietly (probably not quietly) removed the cap with my teeth- I only had one hand. I marked the string where it crossed with the marker and then removed the string gently (probably not very gently). I had done it! Then I dropped everything on the floor and had to get out of bed to pick it up. While I was out of bed on the floor picking up my phone, the marker, and string Sleeping Beauty opened her eyes and asked me what I was doing. I told her I dropped my phone and I was sorry if I woke her up. I would be right back because I had to go to the bathroom. I left the room and measured the string with a measuring tape. I erred on the side of it being too big because I wasn’t sure if I had actually been able to get the string tight enough. This resulted in my 3am ordering of a size seven ring. Was she awake the whole time just pretending to be asleep so she didn’t ruin my secret plan? Totally possible and I will definitely ask her after the proposal. Also she had marker on her hand in the morning and probably wondered how it got there.

Until next weekend I will be constantly stressing and second guessing myself that a 7 was the right size. Until then we just all have to wait to find out!